Boomerang
by olivia.c.king1
Summary: I can't have them both. And I won't let him keep coming back like a boomerang. A Sam/Tom fic.


**A/N: Hello! I thought I'd try something different today! I'd love to hear what you guys think. Xx**

**I can't have them both. And I won't let him keep coming back like a boomerang.**

**A Sam/Tom fic.**

It's difficult. But it always has been. He has always been there at the back of my mind; it seems I can't get rid of him. But do I want to? When there was Dylan there was Ian, and now there's Tom he's back. He's like a boomerang. I laugh drily to myself, I'm engaged. You'd think that would deter him wouldn't you? But he persists; he thinks he still has a chance. He is still living in the past, not letting go. I should talk to him, get things straight in his mind but something is stopping me. Maybe it's the memory of the times we had together. You see, with Ian it was all take what you wanted as today may be your last. Our relationship was built on adrenaline. But with Tom it's different. I know I am safe and loved and I love the feeling. It's just so completely different with each of them. But I can't have both. And I know who I choose. No doubt. Tom.

The ED is bustling with life as I walk into the hospital. I change into my scrubs and wander into cubicles. I like working here, the contact with the patient is great. I used to hate cubicles but now I love it. But I still love Resus, busy and mad and quick, it has the adrenaline that army life gave me. I see Ian and Norman wheeling a chair with a patient in across towards me. Ok, no pressure.

"Hi, this is Jacob Brown who fell off a ladder whilst painting a wall. He has a suspected dislocated shoulder." I thank them and help the patient onto the bed. I catch Ian's arm as he leaves.

"Can I speak to you later?" I ask.

"Sure, when?"

"After shift?"

"Great, I'll meet you in the pub then." I nod and smile, I just hope it doesn't look strained. It wasn't my plan to go to the pub exactly but oh well. What's the worst that could happen?

I stand outside the pub door, am I nervous? I don't know. But I have to set things straight. I love Tom and although Ian might think he still has a chance I have to crush it. I can't have things go wrong with Tom. I love him. I take a deep breath of crisp evening air and enter. Ian looks up and smiles at me, waving me over.

"Hi."

"Can I get you a drink?" He asks. I shouldn't. I have to get home.

"Sure." What? No, that's not what I meant.

"Usual?"

"Yes please." I am mentally kicking myself. I wait for him to return.

"So, why did you want to talk to me?" I think for a second, considering which way to say it.

"I'm marrying Tom." He almost smirks at me.

"I am aware of this fact." I roll my eyes. We sit in silence for a while before he speaks.

"I came back for you."

"I never asked you to."

"But, everything that happened out there… no one understands."

"I know."

"But you do. After blaming myself and wanting myself to die and not the others. I just don't understand."

"What?"

"Why not me? But then… I found my reason."

"What was it?" He stares intently into my eyes. Oh no.

"Ian…"

"Sam, I know. Believe me I do. But I can't. I need you. And maybe, some other bigger force wants us to be together." I shake my head.

"No… no Ian." He grabs my hand and pulls me closer. The desperation in his eyes hurts me deeply.

"Give me a last chance Sam."

"I can't, you know I can't."

"Why not? What did I ever do wrong?" I give no answer because I can't.

"What's so good about Tom anyway?"

"He loves me and cares for me; he makes me feel safe Ian."

"And I didn't? You never wanted to be safe before. Not the Sam I knew." I look at him. He knows how I feel about this. He has a wild look in his eyes and before I know it his lips crush mine, trying to make me see. But I can't; it feels wrong. I pull away.

"I can't do this Ian. And I'm not going to let you. I won't. If you are like this then we can't be friends. I'm sorry. Goodbye." I get up and leave with tears in my eyes. I have to let him go. I love Tom. He can't keep coming back. I have told him it's the end and it really is. Goodbye Ian.

**Thank you for reading, BTW I 3 reviews! Xx**


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